Friday, 22 August 2014

GIRL CHAT | Alone.

girl chat, Friday, Nicki Kinickie

Today's post is submitted by Lyssa - Optimism Proposal

It really depends on your perception of the word. Do you enjoy alone time? Or do you dread it?

I'm one of those people who dread it. And there's a funny twist to this, because when I'm alone I totally LOVE it! But I still have stories in my head from my childhood that when I'm alone, I'm abandoned. Ever get that feeling? It's like that rational, adult side of you is saying "ya, so what if its alone time! Guess what I can do!?", but the younger part says "I'm alone, nobody loves me. No one is coming for me". Its not a good feeling, trust me. I'd rather do without. 

But because I'm constantly seeking growth and understanding of my life, I can take an observer position, and start to grow from my experience. I don't want to be a victim of my life experience, I want to be a thriver- like Arianna Huffington's book "Thrive" (I've been meaning to read this book. I think after completing the books I'm reading right now I'll go to my favourite place in the world and finally purchase it- Chapters!). 

Why let life take you down? Why let someone else tell you what your life is supposed to look like? I loved watching Kris Carr's documentary "Crazy Sexy Cancer". Kris heard by so many medical professionals how she was for sure going to die, she says "I just can't listen to that nonsense". Good for her! Why let someone else tell you what your life is going to look like? Yes, I had a dark childhood, but why would I let that run my current life? I have; the love of my life, my other little love- my son, and my blog where I get to express my creative side. My dreams are in front of me! And sometimes my past can get in the way of my 'right now' moments.

''I'm one of those people who dread it. And there's a funny twist to this, because when I'm alone I totally LOVE it!''

So as my fiancĂ©e begins to take more trips away from home for business, I'm currently working on my emotions. I'd rather not let my emotions, or anyone else run my life. 

Sometimes when we do internal work, it feels like it never gets 'resolved', and that can become quite frustrating! You may think "didn't I just work on this? Shouldn't I be over this by now??". The answer, plain and simple is, you will never 'get over' your life experience. The best we can do is to create new reactions, give more light to those dark places- so they can be seen (when our dark places don't get seen, they will SCREAM for attention sometimes). Its ok to break down every once in a while. Want to know why? Because if we hold back those emotions, they will get stuck, they will hide out and store in the body until another opportunity to come out in a louder, and more poisonous way. And when I mean 'store in the body' I mean, tense muscles; shoulders, jaws, backs, and it can even fester into disease. Louise L. Hay, author of "You can heal your life" talks more about the body, mind connection. Look into her work if your interested. 

How do you deal with a cruddy mood? What is your 'go to' to help yourself?

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This photo is courtesty of arztsamui/

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